


Take Me to Church

by MeCrossYou



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Songfic, challenge, if you heard the song you read the fic, the title says it all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 21:14:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7907881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeCrossYou/pseuds/MeCrossYou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I just wish…” The rest was lost in Iwaizumi’s shirt, but he got it.<br/>“Yeah…” Iwaizumi sighed. “I wish so, too.” </p><p>A challenge fic based on Hozier's "Take Me to Church"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take Me to Church

**Author's Note:**

> So, [fromthefarshore](http://archiveofourown.org/users/fromthefarshore/pseuds/fromthefarshore) challenged me to write a Iwaoi fic based on Hozier's "Take Me to Church" and in return I challenged her to write Aokise fic based on Rihanna, Kanye West, Paul McCartney's "FourFiveSeconds". That shoud come up sometime, too.  
> And some of the rules were that the title had to be the song title and the fic had to have some lines from the song. Spot all of them, there are many.

It all started with a kiss. A quick, sloppy kiss, full of fear. In the dead of night, In Oikawa’s bed, under the covers, trembling, hearts beating with so many confused emotions, fearing they might be caught, not wanting to stop but at the same time wanting to run, far away, forget this, ignore, never to be mentioned again. Why couldn’t they be normal? 

Iwaizumi’s greatest wish was to be normal. He desired to erase this part of him, he wanted to stop the ever increasing flow of tender feelings for his best friend that he has been fighting off for years, since they were just two boys, sure of who they were and sure of what they were doing. He wanted to cut this part of his heart, his brain, his soul, he wasn’t sure. Acceptance was out of the question. And either way, fear has always been stronger. Iwaizumi wanted to escape all this. 

Oikawa knew that. His greatest wish was to be accepted, he desired to live freely, to be able to escape the constant scorching panic to be discovered. Sometimes he couldn’t breathe, pain of not being able to be himself taking away his breath, squeezing his lungs, diming his eyesight, trying to blow his heart up. He wanted to fight, because he couldn’t deal with it anymore. He wanted to see his Iwa-chan happy, to be happy together. Oikawa wanted to move on from all this. 

All this was a secret. 

It all got better with a whispered phrase. One Sunday morning, in the midst of this week’s fresh poison, as Oikawa liked to call their preacher’s sermons, Oikawa leaned in and gently purred in Iwaizumi’s ear. 

“I’d rather you worshiped me in the bedroom.” 

Iwaizumi’s head shot up, franticly looking around, hoping no one heard that.  
“Are you crazy?” He whispered back heatedly, blushing mad. 

Oikawa just smirked at him, and pretended to concentrate on the prayers he had to say. The smirk never left his face. 

When they left their parents to chat at the church, taking the long road home, Iwaizumi made sure no people were in sight before asking. 

“Did you mean it?” 

Oikawa just laughed, took his hand, led them to his house, then to his bedroom. Iwaizumi found out that Oikawa did mean it. He complied. 

It all was almost good when they spent summer days in a forest, laying down on soft moss pillows and just talking. Oikawa with his head on Iwaizumi’s chest, staring up at the sky, half hidden with leafs of tall forest trees. Iwaizumi, on his back, playing with Oikawa’s hair, staring at the leaves blocking the sky. 

It was the place of secrets and it was refreshing and frustrating at the same time but at least they could be themselves there. They didn’t have to hide where everything was naturally hidden. 

“Don’t you think every Sunday’s just getting more bleak?” Oikawa asked, once. 

“What you mean?” Iwaizumi grumbled, sleepily, relaxed. 

“You know, it’s the same stuff every week, at the church. The sermons are different but the main idea is always the same. It all ends up with us in hell.” 

Iwaizumi laughed at that, a dry, spontaneous laugh, that was more like a hard exhale than a real laughter. 

“I guess you’re right, but there’s nothing we can do about it, can we?” He said, taking Oikawa’s hand and placing a small soft kiss on his palm. “And anyway, I’ll see you there, then.” He added. 

Oikawa, with mock offense pouted and tried to punch Iwaizumi’s chest, but the other boy just caught his hand and kissed it again, diffusing all possible annoyance. Few minutes later, when Iwaizumi was about to drift to sleep, he heard a small whisper from Oikawa. 

“I’m going to do something about it.” But Iwaizumi was almost asleep anyway, so he didn’t really catch that. 

It all got worse when Oikawa tried to do something about it. 

“Was this really necessary?” Iwaizumi asked, taking in the piercing in Oikawa’s tongue. 

“Is anything ever, really?” There was a slight lisp to Oikawa’s voice. His tongue must be really hurting, Iwaizumi thought, but the huge satisfied grin never left Oikawa’s face. 

“Are you having your teenage rebellious phase right now? Isn’t it a bit too late?” Iwaizumi crossed his arms, looking and feeling skeptical about his best friend’s (and boyfriend’s, though Iwaizumi never dared to even think that word, because it was forbidden) choices. 

“Oh Iwa-chan, hush, I actually feel cleaner and more human now. I love it. Don’t you?” Oikawa lowered his head and sent Iwaizumi a suggestive gaze through his lowered eyelashes, that he knew his boyfriend (and best friend, though Oikawa preferred to just call him his boyfriend, if only just in his head) were going to love. 

Iwaizumi did. 

It all got bad when Oikawa stopped caring whatsoever. He knew everybody’s disapproval and he couldn’t care less. Iwaizumi cared, though. 

“They’ll _know_ , Tooru!” he pleaded, desperately trying to talk some sense into Oikawa. 

“So what? I don’t care if they do.” Oikawa shot back, trying to look like he didn’t care, inspecting his new tattoo in the mirror. 

“I do!” Iwaizumi argued, pacing back and forth in Oikawa’s room. “They’ll find us out, and then our parents will freak out and I’ll…” He stopped abruptly, realizing what he was about to say wouldn’t sound right. Because that was inevitable anyway. Iwaizumi didn’t want to lose Oikawa, but he always felt that the threat was looming just above his head, at least ever since Oikawa’s hatred got more and more intense. 

“You’ll what, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asked, smile cold as ice and ready to kill. “Lose me?” 

Oikawa has always known Iwaizumi better than anyone. Iwaizumi has always felt like there was so much more to learn about Oikawa every day. 

“Yeah…” he whispered, because there was no place to back down now. 

“You don’t have to, you know.” Oikawa’s smile was still ice cold and the scariest thing Iwaizumi has ever seen. “You can come with me. After we graduate. We can leave together.” 

Iwaizumi sat down on Oikawa’s bed. “You know I can’t do that, Tooru… My parents…” 

“Why do you still care?” Oikawa interrupted him, almost shouting. “If they can’t accept you for what you are, why are you so intent on suffering? So you’ll stay here and worship like a dog every week and what then? Marry some girl you don’t love just because… because…” Tears were streaming down his face in tiny rivers and Iwaizumi’s heart was the sea that they went to. 

“They are my family, Tooru.” He whispered into Oikawa’s hair, hugging him close. 

Oikawa sobbed for what felt like seconds, because the closeness was pleasant but too short. Iwaizumi despaired for what felt like hours, because the sea was overflowing and his heart could not contain it any longer. 

“I know. I just wish…” The rest was lost in Iwaizumi’s shirt, but he got it. 

“Yeah…” Iwaizumi sighed. “I wish so, too.” 

It all ended when Oikawa went. Iwaizumi stayed and hated his life, hated himself, but did nothing about it. He could not stop being afraid. Every Sunday was a torture, every mass felt like hell. 

“Did you hear about the Oikawa boy?” He heard his mother talking to a neighbor after church. “They say he was seen with a _boy_. Being _intimate_ with a boy.” The neighbor whispered, like it was too shameful to say out loud. 

Iwaizumi stopped dead in his track, clenching his fists. 

“Lord save him.” His mother let out, shocked. “And to think he was such good friends with my son.” She looked like the memory was literally painful. 

Iwaizumi spent all his life being scared. Wanting to run away. He spent it hiding, hating that he was loving and loving that he was hating. In that moment, the sea did overflow. Finally. 

“He still is.” He spat through gritted teeth, loud enough for both women to hear. 

His mother looked at him sharply. “I know you’ve known him for long, Hajime, but that kind of man is not a good friend to have.” 

“He is good enough for me.” Iwaizumi could melt mountains with the heat of his determination. 

“Hajime, think of what you’re saying.” His mother looked around, lowering her voice to almost frantic whisper. “People might think you’re like him.” 

That was when Iwaizumi saw his own fear reflected on his mother’s face. He never thought he could feel relief as strong as in that moment. All seas washed through, leaving him refreshed and clean. The fear was gone. 

“I am like him, mother.” He said, smile beginning to appear on his face. And to think all it took was to see a mirror. “And I am going.” Iwaizumi said, and went. 

It all started again when Iwaizumi knocked on Oikawa’s dorm room door. 

**Author's Note:**

> So... Challenge completed?


End file.
